Oracle's Way

Introduction

In this article, I will explain how I get girls: the different phases, why they exist, and how to deal with them. The model is a mix of two worlds: the need to efficiently meet real world challenges with the need to stay congruent with yourself. Thus, it is a consistent and efficient fusion of a logical and emotional perspective; a coalition of the pragmatic and the ideal.

It is my personal perspective on "sarging": I feel no need to convince others to share it with me, nor do believe that everyone would gain from understanding this. I believe this to be the kind of knowledge that comes to life in the hands of the right person, but is otherwise useless.

I will present my way by first explaining the key observations I've made, that is, the fundamental facts of sarging. I will then present my personal philosophy. Finally, by combining the two, I will present the step by step model.



The World: Fundamental Observations



These are the facts I've gathered through my experiences, with the help of many both skilled and intelligent PUAs I've met.

This is the practical, outer game part of the model. The ideal, inner game part is given in the next section. Together they form the model I will present.

No arguments will be given here, I am simply going to state the propositions.


Attraction Determinism
Attraction can be amplified when it already exists, according to my escalation model. However, the first sparkle, the initial attraction, cannot be created. It is either present or not from the beginning. If it's not there, in 95% of all cases, there's nothing you can do to bring it to life. Her initial attraction however, can disappear if you do things that are not consistent with her preferences.

Rationalization
Humans rationalize their investments (or lack thereof) towards others by increasing or decreasing their compliance. The details are in my escalation model. Connection is entirely built through rationalization of investments, whereas an initial spark of attraction is needed to kick start the escalation process (see Attraction Determinism above).

Two Compliance Mechanisms
There are two, and only two, mechanisms that create more compliance: attraction and connection. They can both be measured on a one-dimensional scale, such as from -10 (disgust/hatred) to 0 (neutral/indifferent) to 10 (burning passion/deep love).

Attraction functions as the selection mechanism and defines ones mate preferences. Connection works as a second layer built on top of attraction, by offering irrationality of mating preferences to increase ones own attractiveness. See Rationality and Genuine behavior.

Human Nature
The theory of human sexuality given by evolutionary psychology is correct, both in their assumptions, reasoning, and more importantly, conclusions, implications, and predictions. See Evolution of Desire and Evolutionary Psychology: The New Science of the Mind, both books written by David Buss.


The Self: Fundamental Perspective

My fundamental perspective on human existence and meaning is that of Objectivism.

The question that remains is: which girls can offer me happiness through sexual satisfaction, friendship, and love? Here are the basic criteria:

1. I must want her, I have to be sexually attracted to her.
2. She must want me. She must be sexually attracted to me.
3. She must be willing to comply through the necessary steps that lead to sex: opening, moving, and extraction.

My brain is perfectly capable of automatically evaluating my own attraction for girls on the fly, so the first point is not an issue (unless I am wondering where to go to find my type of girls, but that is beyond the scope of this article).

The second one demands that she is attracted. The third demands that she will comply. Since compliance comes through attraction, the third point is implied by the second.

The third point is known as the principle of choice: in PUA form, it demands that girls have chosen to comply (usually unconsciously, but sometimes explicitly) to my escalation baits. Another way of stating it is that it forbids plowing, or any techniques that would push you through any significant escalation steps: reaching the social hook point (girls that don't want to talk to me won't talk to me), isolation or mini-isolation (is she doesn't even want to leave her friends for a short while with me, there's nothing to build a rapport driven interaction), extraction (if she doesn't want to go home with me, we're not going to have sex anyway), and setting up a day 2. In essence, the principle of choice in PUA form is "I only like girls that want me 100%".

The widespread view that one must chose between inner and outer game - "do what you are" and "convey what she wants" - what we are and what we do - are separated only holds when one doesn't have "inner game". When you don't have a strong identity, of course actions that are incongruent with your personality will feel awkward. What it takes to do things that we wouldn't feel good doing, is a strong identity, because when you truly know who you are, you can do anything - things that are consistent with your personality, and things that are not, because you already know that the things you don't like doing must be done for a reason, for something you ultimately believe in. Just like you may have to endure painful training to get muscles, or hard working days of work to fulfill your dreams, you may have to do sacrifices to get girls. The only price we never pay, is to let go of our core - our self respect and independence.

The starting point for this model is the assumption that you have a strong identity, self esteem, and confidence. Not the kind you like to brag about, but the real thing - the one that never makes you feel any need to show others, because it isn't about them but you.


The Model

Since the model directly reflects my private perspective and philosophy, it contains some main features of my own personality. I will restrict the model to the time up until the first sexual encounter.

Firstly, it emphasizes simplicity. There are no unnecessary steps. Everything develops in a simple, natural way.

Secondly, there are no flashy, cool things that are done to impress your friends. Everything is aimed at getting the job done, and the job is to quickly reach a sexual relationship that the both of you will appreciate because of mutual attraction.

Thirdly, the flow of escalation is never broken: this model is not created to turn hesitant girls into FBs, but to get everything rolling from start to finish. The flow of escalation is tested three or four times during the interaction: during the opening stage, to see if she wants to interact (hooks); shortly thereafter, to see if she is willing to move; and finally, to extract; or, if extraction is not an option, arrange for a day 2. If the flow of escalation is broken at any of those moments - meaning the defies one of these important steps - everything the two of you have "built" breaks. You will leave her, with no intentions to try to get her back. More generally, you will never plow, since that is something that already indicates a broken flow of escalation (by lack of compliance).

The model builds around my escalation model, with some requirements:

1. Initial attraction must be present to kick start escalation
2. She/they must comply to an implicit move (or explicit) shortly after opening
3. She must comply to an explicit extraction or an explicit day 2

Although kino escalation is normally present after step (2) - and it is indeed good to have it as early as possible - it is strictly speaking not necessary. However, if you have kino escalation and she doesn't comply to kissing, then the flow of escalation is considered broken and you'll eject immediately. Again: if there is kino and you fail to kiss, it is an additional requirement that you eject immediately.


Step 1: Initial Attraction

Initial attraction is the first thing that needs to be present. A girl's attraction level is usually obvious: it is reflected by how responsive she is. The details have been treated in hundreds of books, but the best way to calibrate this is through personal experiences (intuition).

After 0-20 seconds, you will know whether you have reached the social hook point. There are 3 typical kinds of responses:


1. She doesn't wanna talk to you
This is the obvious one. She is ignoring you, or at least trying to. This, as you may have guessed, means she definitely isn't attracted to you. The number of possible reasons are endless: she could have had a bad day, she could have misinterpreted you, she could have found you to be repulsive, she may have a jealous boyfriend nearby. The one thing all reasons share happens to be the only reason that matters: that you don't need a reason, and you won't get one. Eject immediately, without any comment, neither positive nor negative. Be indifferent; but don't try to be indifferent.

2. She isn't attracted but wants to have a nice conversation
She contributes to the conversation, but doesn't smile or giggle much. Look at her facial expressions. She doesn't look happy nor bored. Some of these girls are sometimes possible to attract with a variety of different techniques that all involve breaking rapport - anything from indirectness to arrogance could work. In this model however, we simply eject without even trying. If they turn out to be attracted, they'll give proximity or AIs later. If they don't, well, then they don't. Remember, this model emphasises that concept such as self esteem and self respect are more important than anything else - including girls. Be truly indifferent to girls that don't really want you.

I could certainly have more girls by working harder on the ones that didn't really like me in the first place, those that were hesitating, not really knowing if I would be good enough or not. These girls are considering you from a "50-50" perspective, and if they do chose you it means you are about "51%" right and "49%" wrong, or in other words, close to not being good enough. Such girls have nothing to offer me in terms of happiness through sexual and emotional satisfaction, because I will never be a second hand choice to anyone else. Such people cannot appreciate me for what I appreciate myself for, and hence offer me little more than something to kill time with. And I am not the one who will be waiting, hoping that they would "see me in another light" and "realize" that I am the perfect one for them. I would much rather find the ones which would never hesitate to have me, the ones that say "yes!" immediately, and from there, there is a steep escalation all the way to sex, and later, perhaps love.


3. She is attracted to you and wants you to stay
As above, she contributes to the conversation, but this time she is also smiling or giggling. She looks happy, and has more eye contact with you. She carefully listens to what you have to say, may interrupt her friends to talk to you, may stand noticeably closer to you than what would be considered normal distance for formal conversation, will not pull away when you come closer or touch her.

Her compliance level, of course, may not be high enough to sleep with you immediately, but you have pretty much reached the hook point as soon as you open, and she will even help you continue the interaction by asking questions, telling you things, or simply stand in front of you, looking at you. She would even pretend like your semi-crappy indirect opener is interesting because she likes you.
This is the girls you want in your life. They are naturally attracted to you, and their attraction for you will never fade. They may stop seeing you for specific reasons, such as you refusing to quit sleeping with other girls, but they will still always feel something when they see you, and that is because they are predisposed to be attracted to you. You are one of her chosen ones, attraction-wise, and such preferences remain very constant over time.


Opening
What should you open it? The type of opener matters a lot: you want to use openers that you feel good about using in various situations. If you don't like canned openers, don't use them. Go situational and spontaneous. If you prefer not to be creative in the field, go canned: use indirect or direct canned openers, or quasi-spontaneous openers. Do whatever works for you. You may want different types of openers depending on the situation, you may want different types of openers depending on venue. The most important thing is that you like the openers you are using, so that you will open congruently and properly.

There are many ways to hide ones fear of rejection. One of the most popular ways is to make the opening as insincerely as possible, so that you could then tell yourself "of course it didn't work! I wasn't even trying to open, I'm just messing around!!". The problem is, simply put, that it doesn't work. Don't be the entertainer/dancing monkey and don't fake energy just to open a set. Just open in a way that feels genuine to you. Be prepared to be rejected for who you really are; don't put on a protection mask. We want to be chosen for the closest thing to what we are, and rejected on the same grounds.


Step 2: Implicit Move

You could be standing talking to the girl you want all night, without anything interesting ever happening. Although it may feel convenient to keep girls hooked for as long as possible, I don't deal with show game. Escalation needs to take place, otherwise sex will be an increasingly distant dream.

The first escalation step will be an implicit move, and it will be done within the first two minutes maximum. You will try to move the girl, or the group, to another spot. Mini-isolation shows some amount of compliance, but doesn't qualify as a move. The move can be to anywhere: to the bar, to a sitting area (isolation), to another room. The important point is to make them invest by going somewhere else with you. The dance floor doesn't qualify as a proper move (because it doesn't necessarily require any compliance), but it may be used as an intermediate step to move her somewhere else (usually not recommended).

Implicit means that the move can be subtle: you could for example start moving while talking and wait for her to "unconsciously" follow, or if you have kino, you could take her hand, start walking and say "come", or you could tell her you are going to introduce her to your friends and start moving. The point is that you don't need to "force" a choice by using "Do you want to..." or anything similar (that would be an explicit move).

By all means, an explicit move is preferable to an implicit since it proves you have a significant amount of attraction, and also, she will rationalize much stronger when the hoops are explicit ("because I really wanted to do go with him!"). The problem with explicit hoops is that they require more compliance, and as this move happens shortly after opening, you don't want to put too much pressure on her/them.

While moving, grab your girl's hand and leading her. Even if she isn't attracted she's likely to comply. The point is not so much to check for attraction (since it doesn't give you much information) than it is to get smooth kino escalation right after the move.

The move is not only a matter of checking for compliance, it is also a strategic move to set up for easier escalation (socially, kino, and ultimately, the extraction step). The psychology behind it should be obvious: when you enter a set where they are located, it feels like you are "invading" their space; when you move them, it feels like they are tagging along with you to where ever you want to go. From then on, they are there with you.

If she/they defy the move, you will eject immediately (that's the point of these steps: they each represent an important decision point).


Step 3: Explicit Extraction

Extraction usually occurs within two hours from meeting. The earlier, the better.

The extraction step is very simple, because all it takes is one explicit question: "Do you want to go home with me?". Any variation of that line would work. I could even say "I want to go home with you now.", where the following silence will work as the explicit choice she will have to make.

The important thing is that the extraction step is phrased as an explicit choice and that the purpose of the extraction is sexual. This is the raw genuinity with which I've developed the model: no plausible deniability will be used here.

If she complies, you won't have any problems with LMR once you initiate foreplay. If you still do, simply ask "Do you not want this?". If she hesitates just a little, try releasing her discomfort by reinitiating the escalation. If she says "no", ask her to leave (if you don't, she will make you feel very gay sleeping next to her without doing anything).

If she doesn't comply to extraction (the reasons are irrelevant), set up a day 2 according to what's written below.


Step 2.5: Setting up for a day 2

The set up is explicit. Tell her you would like to see her again. Then, ask her if she wants to see you again. Then give her your number, and tell her you would be happy if she called you. This way, you will make her give you a proof of attraction by contacting you, which will will then rationalize for the next meeting. It is important that you don't exchange numbers: if you do, she won't contact you since she will expect you to do so, knowing you have her number. If you don't have her number, she knows you can't contact her, and so she will have to be the one who does it. If she insists on you taking hers too, do it, but remember that you will have to be the one contacting her.

When you want to set up your day 2, usually through a phone call or text, make it explicit: "I want to see you again. When is good for you?". Make it clear that you want to see her because of her. Don't use any implicit, indirect methods like "me and my friends are going to do something, join us". She has to make a choice, we are not going to work on squishing through her compliance levels. This set up for day 2 is also what you will do when you have already had sex with her on your day 1 (FNC), and you want to continue the escalation.


Important notes on kino

Although kino typically starts during the move (by grabbing her hand), or right after (brush kino), it isn't always necessary. By calibrating your "girl attraction radar", you will quickly see how attracted she is by simply look at her face (what emotions it expresses), rather than through more complicated things, like her body language, voice, or voice/language.

When she is attracted, you may sometimes notice that she neither responds to nor avoids your kino. These girls are usually passive-submissive, and contrary to what most guys think, they can be closed. What they respond to is usually "lack of choice", in the sense that they want to be lead as much as possible. Hence they will agree to all implicit escalation, and in particular, to the move in step (2). However, they may hesitate on explicit extraction, because it puts pressure on them. There are thus two instances where you would perhaps rather use implicit extraction: when you meet passive-submissive girls and have no kino, and when you caveman and have heavy kino. Ironically, these are two opposites.

Now kissing. Kissing is not always necessary to do before foreplay, but if it becomes a natural part of the physical escalation, it should be done (unless you have specific reasons for avoiding it, such as consciously wanting to frustrate her, and she knows it and likes it). Kissing is typically a natural continuity during kino escalation, and should then always be done implicitly during hold kino (see my post about kino escalation). When there isn't a natural way into kissing, there is almost never any reason to go for the kiss anyway. If you for some very specific reason would want to do it anyway, you would have to use an explicit hoop.

If they defy kissing, they are not attracted (or not passive-submissive), you have just created negative compliance, and you will now eject immediately. If they hesitate, skip the kissing step entirely and try to extract shortly thereafter. The logic is that she may hesitate because she wants to be with you but doesn't want anyone else to see you kissing in the club, or wants to save the kissing for foreplay. In either case, you try to extract, and if it doesn't work, you will eject immediately.

This is the core of the model. It catches most of what's relevant during a sarge. As I develop, the model develops too, so expect small updates to be made.

Any questions and comments welcome.